You Are Stronger Than You Think You Are

This is it. Day 45. If you survived the challenge, let me know how it went for you.

As we end this challenge, I want to leave you with one last thought:

You are stronger than you think you are.

I know it sounds cliche, but it’s true.

A few years back, I was working on getting my free-diving certification. After several attempts, I reached a plateau at 35 feet. I made it successfully once but could not get back to that depth again. On each successive dive, my monkey mind would take over, convincing me I would run out of air. Panic set in. I felt compelled to try and take a breath before surfacing (challenging, at best, when underwater). The contractions in my diaphragm felt overwhelming. The surface seemed so far away.

My instructor was a Korean man named J. He worked as a dive instructor in the Philippines to practice his English. It made for a good pairing because he knew free-diving, and I knew English. Well, redneck English anyway. It made for interesting conversation floating in 500 feet of water on a buoy off the coast of Lapu Lapu. He gave me some time to recover after another failure. I stretched my arms over the buoy and stared at the plate hanging from a rope 35 feet below and the endless abyss beyond it.

Finally, he said “You know Will. It’s in your head. You strong enough but brain get in way. I will raise the plate, and you go again so your brain get victory.” Seemed plausible to me. Each of my last failures had been within arm’s reach of the plate. As he prepared, I started my breathing exercises for the dive. After a few minutes, he said “Ok, you take your time. I ready when you are.” Two more breaths, I slipped silently below the surface, pointing my head toward the void below. I let myself fall, focusing on remaining streamlined to conserve energy. The plate was getting closer. The plankton passed in front of my mask. My mind offered the thought “How many whales are here that could swallow you whole while searching for plankton?” Thanks, brain. No, really- thanks for sharing that right now.

The plate was within reach. I stretched my arm out to grab it, ensuring I held on long enough for J to see I had made it. He would send me back down if I didn’t. I tucked my head toward my legs to reverse course and start my ascent. I caught a glimpse of the sun above; the surface seemed so far away. My diaphragm started to contract, trying to get a breath of air. I reminded myself it was just a chemical reaction and only sparsely related to the oxygen level in my bloodstream. I remembered J’s words " when contractions start, relax into them. Explore them for what they are: just muscles moving." Slowly, I kicked, striving for the balance of forward momentum with minimal energy expenditure. It was getting lighter; I was getting closer to the surface. I had been below the surface for over 2 minutes.

Finally, my head breaks the surface, and I feel the sun on my face. I take a deep, controlled breath and wrap my arms around the buoy to remain afloat if I pass out. J was laughing. Not just laughing but absolutely howling. He would have been rolling on the floor, clutching his stomach if we had been on dry land. “I trick you, I trick you, Will! HA HA HA HA HA!” What? What are you talking about? “I not raise the plate. I put it deeper. I put plate at 45 feet, and you make it!”

Fucking asshole.

He was right, though; that was funny as hell. And his point was valid. The depth was never the limiting factor at all.

It was me.

So as we end this 45-day challenge, what is your limiting factor? What will prevent you from continuing on this path of living the life you designed for yourself?

You.

You are the only thing stopping yourself. Are you up for it?